@Real_Countress: I'd rather everyone think I had a serious cocaine problem then them know I just finished a bag of powdered donuts to myself
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@ImJESSPlayin: Maybe, "only if you're taking me to dinner" wasn't the best response to, "is this going down?" to the guy on the elevator. Flirting is hard
@215potter: To my future kids: I apologize for the lack of college funds... Blame mom, she INSISTED on organic produce from Whole Foods.
@JesKeepSwimming: I was going to spend the next 6 years studying medicine to become a doctor. Then I realized I could just like Facebook photos to save lives.