@HRTSMRT: I'd say at least 10% of parenting is smelling stuff.
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@SamGrittner: I've honestly never been more disappointed in life than when I found out that the Miami Dolphin football team was made up entirely of people
@twelveyearsold: i was just roughed up by a hipster bully. he gave me a knuckle sandwich, but also offered a gluten free alternative
@Sal0630: GF looking at lines in carpet: Aww, you vacuumed for me? Me: *flashback to me rollerblading in the living room* Sure did, babe.