@TastyTuneTweets: Idea: ATM that sends you encouraging messages like "You Can Do it" or "Ramen Noodles Aren't So Bad" when you check your sad Account Balance
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@jazmasta: I'd like to buy this EXTRA SMALL condom please. "Sir, that is a sleeping bag" *winks at cashier continually until she finishes her shift*
@rolldiggity: Prince: "The slipper fits! You're the girl I met!" Girl: "I wasn't even at the ball. This is a common shoe size." Prince: "YOU'RE THE GIRL!"
@dafloydsta: I'm commonly known to my friends as "that nutty guy" Haha, just kidding. Squirrels can't talk.