@Home_Halfway: If a bear approaches you, give up and let him eat you. He's adorable and humans are overpopulated, take one for the team
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@3sunzzz: This chicken is so moist, what is your secret? I squeeze a little KY Jelly into its cavity before heating.
@JPHaddadio: They should put a statue of me next to the Statue of Liberty so immigrants know the American Dream is hit or miss.