@tigersgoroooar: If a boy put rose petals all over my bed I’d be like you’re cleaning this up I’m not cleaning this up
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@OtherDanOBrien: ME: (signing) What color are apples? BOBO THE GORILLA: (signing) Please free me from this prison ME: (writing) Still struggling with colors
@BriarSlyMadness: Believing that you are popular or "famous" on twitter... ...is like believing you are rich because you won a game of Monopoly.
@juneohara65: I have a time phobia. *looks at watch, panics *looks at clock, panics *looks at thyme "This I can handle."
@WorkingMom86: My son got very excited about all the toys he found when I cleaned behind the couch, I should have waited till Christmas morning to do that