@GrantTanaka: If a cop yells at you to GET DOWN just start twerking cause damn, dude, be more specific
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@Angrytrashman: I grew up in a time where your mothers saliva was the most powerful cleaning agent around.
@LovestruckLayla: So I have one coworker who uses "irregardless" and another who uses "unappropriate" and now I'm over trying to conversate with these people.
@skylerhanrath: [pirate ship] Pirate: Walk the plank Me: *struts down like nobody's business* Pirate: wait come back that was awesome you're one of us now