@omgthatspunny: If a deaf person goes to court, is it still a hearing?
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@MJMcKean: I don't know who the pun editor of the NY Post is, but the headline PEACHES' DEATH IS STILL FUZZY deserves a citation and/or beating.
@Manda_like_wine: My cat just started kneading my back in bed and I said "not now" so wish us luck we're officially married.
@AimeeHelene1: Geez, I'm so sorry...I'm not normally ticklish. (me to the nail lady I just kicked in the face during my pedicure)
@_notyourmom_: My 13 year old doesn't speak when she picks up the phone. She just listens and hangs up. I think she's going to be a hitman someday.