@OfficialBanks93: If a murderer wanted to lure me out of my room all he'd have to do is turn off my wifi cause sure as shit i'm gonna see why it aint working
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@hobo_hands: Having swords for arms was a terrible first wish but it was a genie and I blurt weird things out when I panic.
@Sickayduh: Scientists are dumb. A meteor didn't kill the dinosaurs. I've been to the museum. It's obvious they starved to death.
@earthfalcon33: PRANK: ask someone what's on their shirt and when they look down give them a perm
@WildeThingy: Teacher "Hi, why are you here?" Me "Um, isn't this the beginners' philosophy class?" Teacher "Yes and you're off to a really bad start."