@waydybee: if a pea-brain is someone with a small brain, then a peacock is someone with a ...? no?
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@NicestHippo: DETECTIVE: There are signs of a struggle here [earlier that morning] ME: *trying to get up for work*
@EliTerry: "Our relationship is nice because we can sit silently and still have fun." - cool thing to say to the person in bathroom stall next to you.
@Unkle_K: I hate that, you go to someone's wedding and they're asking "who invited you" my friend focus on your union and let me eat in peace