@fleshcake: If a puppy stabbed me in the face and stole my car, I'd still be like, "aww."
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Brampersandon_: [Americas Got Talent] ME: *reads an opinion different than mine online without getting offended* JUDGE (under his breath): how'd he do that
@Robinbuble: I have a mice problem so I lay out tiny red and blue bandanas in hopes they start a west coast/east coast thing and take care of each other.
@Epygma: *Jesus drinking at a bar* *jesus orders another drink* "jesus you're too drunk I can't give you anymore" Kan I jst haev a water? "nice try"