@CVTBaby: If a tree falls in the woods and there is no one to hear it, he still tries to play it off like he meant it so the other trees don't laugh.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@flashember: YOGI: Close your eyes and breathe. ME: [angrily rolling up my mat] I was under the impression this was a picnic and you were a talking bear
@RidiculousSheri: I have two boyfriends! Well, I'm dating two men Okay. Ben and I are just friends Same with Jerry Fine. I have ice cream. But it's love.
@DadandBuried: Doing LEGO with my son is like assisting during surgery. 6yo: Flat gray piece. Me: Here. 6: 5 square red blocks. M: Here. 6: I said RED!