@landonashworth: If a vegan does crossfit which do they talk about first?
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@TheMichaelRock: [first date] me: so what do you do for a living? her: I study foreign languages me[trying to impress her] bone apple tea, moon cherry
@Bob_Janke: A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says why the long face and he says it's so when I'm eating prairie grasses I can see predators
@abhorrent_wife: Sometimes I have my shit together, sometimes I eat an unidentified white substance out of my hair and am grateful when it's frosting.