@RobDenBleyker: If a woman asks you to guess her age, always subtract 10 years from your estimate. IMPORTANT: Do NOT do this if she's in her early twenties.
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@JennyJohnsonHi5: As a kid my mom laughed at me because I was always worrying about being shot with a crossbow while on the toilet. Well who's laughing now?
@ClichedOut: Interviewer: What's your greatest strength? Incredible Hulk: Int: Hulk: Is that a trick question?
@kDuncanG: Don't tell me what your cats' names are, I'll call'em what I want. Oh, Mittens & Snuggles? WRONG. THAT'S WILDSTYLE & THAT'S SNACKMOUTH.