@OhNoSheTwitnt: If a woman wears a ponytail holder on her wrist at all times that means she's always down to pull her hair back and fight you.
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@Donna_Gallers: Avoid the horror of watching your children’s nativity this year by using a condom approximately six years before you have to attend.
@ArfMeasures: *burst into doctor's office* ME: I'm no longer canstopetid DOCTOR: You mean constipated ME: No I've had a vowel movement DOCTOR: Get out
@Zoozich: I just really hate it when people start assuming things.nnnJust like my boss he assumes that I'm working just because I came to work today.