@Terdoh: If aliens are only on the quest for intelligent life, then Earth really has nothing to worry about.
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@DillDoes: Sir it would appear that you have sugar poisoning "You mean Diabetes?" Ooh look at me, I'm a patient that knows all the diseases ooh
@bacon_gillepic: Puts cardboard cutout of myself at my desk a week ago* Receives check* Dang I just got a raise
@neiltyson: Odd that the silent way to alert performers they should quickly end their act is a gesture to slice your own throat.