@SteveSuckington: If aliens are supposed to be so much more advanced than us, how did ET not know about texting?
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@BuckyIsotope: *jumps out of plane* *begins reading parachute instruction manual* STEP 1: PUT ON PARACHUTE *looks up* Well hell
@TheBeerdedOne: Lottery gives you a 1 in 200M chance of skipping work tomorrow...alcohol is 1 in 5. You play your game...I'll play mine
@sammyrhodes: I wonder if girls got mad on dates in the 1700?s because guys kept checking their treasure maps.