@ShakespeareSong: If Anne hath a will, Anne Hathaway.
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@flashember: *wakes up in the belly of a whale* me: this can't be happening again morgan freeman: but it was, he was in the belly of a whale again
@SortaBad: If you don't want to be there today, just say "I'm just here for the food and hopefully some good commercials. Also congrats on the wedding"
@caliluvgirl77: [staff meeting] "Ya so heads up, someone grabbed my lunch from the fridge, and there's a 420% chance you shouldn't eat the brownie inside"
@Cheeseboy22: A terrible baby shower game idea is called, "Have a man come in and guess which woman at the shower is pregnant."