@sixthformpoet: If another day goes by without a Matthew, Mark, Luke and John forming a boyband called New Testament, I'm going to give up on everything.
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@Sickayduh: "The Jetsons and Flintstones existed at the same time. One in the sky, one on the ground, and both in a post-apocal-" "Juror is dismissed"
@BobTheSuit: 911: Your emergency? -Karen asked me a question. 911: Not an emergency. -She asked if I could be more pacific. 911: Cars are on their way.
@Tmoney68: Have manufacturers of picket fences ever gone on strike? Because the irony would be awesome. Take your time, I'll wait.
@QwertyJones3: PILLOW: Hey, your anniversary is today, go buy her some flowers ME: Wow, thank God for memory foam