@Luiki89: If anyone needs an ark, I Noah guy.
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@rachxthompson: me: could my thighs get any bigger? *sits down* me: oh look now they're the size of Australia
@BeingDBEAST: The kid next door just challenged me to a water fight, so I thought I'd tweet this while I wait for the water to boil...
@that1bish27: "I traded my carpet in for bare floors" --coworker. "Oh, me too. I love the shaved look.", said me. Apparently, she really meant carpet.