@slimmy_shady: If anyone wants a tiger let me know. I bought one but he's being a d-bag and won't wear the matching sunglasses I bought us.
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@Brentweets: If someone is choking the best thing to do is ask them if they're okay repeatedly then if that fails give a concerned look until resolved.
@MissAnneBlondie: Coffee so strong, you finish the "to do" list, that you haven't even written yet.
@juliussharpe: A new study shows dolphins have great memory. Memories include "Swam in water" and "Ate".
@themiltron: [first day as a server] me: how would u like your steak person: well done me: thank you that's so kind it's my first day & i'm very nervous