@weinerdog4life: If dolphins are so smart, how come they work at Sea World?
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@Hormonella: God: Let's give them the ability to feel remorse. Satan: I like that. Say, from 2:00 - 4:00 AM?
@hipchkk: If the majority of twitter's trending topics are any indication of the state of humanity thus far, we clearly need an asteroid intervention.
@thepunningman: Police: Cover me Rookie: ok [pulls out guitar] Every little thing she does is magic