@weinerdog4life: If dolphins are so smart, how come they work at Sea World?
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@DistractedMomma: Can one of you please tell my ex husband that I died? I feel like it would be more believable coming from someone other than me.
@thedailymarker: When life gives me lemons, I make lemon meringue pie..because lemonade is for amateurs...& because I'm gay..& we always take it up a notch.
@Glynner85: The best part about having a muppet for a best friend is that when you're done singing songs, BOOM free oven mitt.