@trevso_electric: If eHarmony were honest, it would pair some people with a room full of cats.
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@filmbizpro: Condoms aren't completely safe. A friend of mine was wearing one and got hit by a bus.
@UncleDuke1969: Me: C'mon. Dog: No. Me: Let's go. Dog: No. Me: Please? Dog: YOU TRYING TO KILL ME?!? Me: It's just rain. Dog: I already pooped in your shoe.
@RunwayDan: Airbags should deploy in the form of balloon animals. Sure, you've been in an accident, but now you have a whimsical puppy dog.