@trevso_electric: If eHarmony were honest, it would pair some people with a room full of cats.
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@Playing_Dad: Reporter: Is there anything you can do to make people hate you more? Rodger Goodell: Coldplay is doing the Super Bowl halftime show.
@Tmoney68: They say there's no such thing as a free lunch, but I'm at Applebee's & have a dead mouse in my pocket that says otherwise.
@jake_likes_naps: *locks hands with stranger in elevator* im nervous, this is my first time flying