@trevso_electric: If eHarmony were honest, it would pair some people with a room full of cats.
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@BlackJerms: So what do you think? New hair? No Shoes? No Bag? No Pants? No * 3 days later watching TV OMG u rearranged the living room - Men
@kumailn: "Forget our mess. I'll go into the beauty of the natural world." *Planet Earth 2. 100 snakes swarm iguana baby* "I'll go back to the news."
@mattgallo123: My waterproof phone is advertised in commercials with people surfing and kayaking and here I am tweeting in the shower.
@themiltron: god: go to earth jesus: why god: i have a plan jesus: is it a nice plan god: it's a plan