@daveexplosm: If God hates gays so much, why didn't he put it in the ten commandments? Instead he's more pissed that you're jealous of your friend's PS4
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@pinningnut: My husband and I are thinking about leaving everything to our dog. What he will do with $20.00 I don't know. But I hope he enjoys it.
@Jaywoo74: If you don't think of 50 different ways to murder your boss every morning on your drive to work you're probably the boss
@RandomlyMJ: Thanks to Twitter I will never again ask a man "What are you thinking?" Because now I know and I am horrified.