@GrandadJFreeman: If Google can't find the answer, it's not a question.
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@ericsshadow: My son asked me to explain women to him, so I bought him an XBOX game for his Playstation.
@KoKeniSasquatch: Dear Grocery store clerk, What part of me searching madly and paying in nickels & dimes suggests I can donate a dollar to the food bank?
@MatCro: ME: I want the car's brake lines to rust SCIENTIST: I'm listening ME: [slides over envelope full of cash] But make it look like an oxidant
@Ivsy01: Me:Thank you, he's so hot I don't even know what I want to do first...Grandma: (interrupting) Okay, can someone else say the prayer please?