@heatherlou_: If his selfie doesn't make you kegal, you're just not that into him.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@MisterBombay: If I were a fashion designer I wouldn't spend any money on advertising but rather pay old people to wear my competitor's clothing
@hoedeehoe: Jesus: and when there was but 1 set of footprints, there I carried u Me: (checks fitbit) ok, phew, it counted the steps, I still got credit
@Tommytoughstuff: Career day: Hi kids I'm Bills Dad and I work at the local morgue. Who wants to pet a dead body?"
@Jake_Vig: Some people rescued a great white shark that washed up on a beach, just like sharks would do for us if we were carried out into the ocean.