@causticbob: If homosexuals come out of the closet, do necrophiliacs come out of the casket?
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@mrtruthandsoul: No thanks, ads to buy more followers; I get them the old-fashioned way: by telling them they're gonna die and I can save them.
@Classy_Cassy89: If the people in your car don't match the stick figures on your rear window, I'll report your vehicle stolen.
@slimmy_shady: When I was having an affair with twins, people used to ask how I told them apart. Well, Sue had brown eyes and Steve had a moustache.
@causticbob: A man has been jailed for forging banknotes. He also got a big fine which he immediately paid in crisp $9 notes.