@TheSadnesses: if I am elected governor I will eat your pillow while you sleep and unlike my opponent I will also do it if I am not elected
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@knot_eye: "Once we come down off this wall we'll be on the lam. That means we're fugitives, laying low, on the run..." - condescending con descending
@thenatewolf: The lights are dimmed. Sexy music plays. She runs her fingers across my scar. "I got that when I fell off the toilet," I whisper.
@TheHyyyype: [philosophy class] PROFESSOR: u must question everything [later] ME: *grabs lamp and shakes it* what have u been doing all day?!
@AnkCoupleTO: If my mom had just faked having a headache I wouldn't be writing this bullshit on the internet right now