@_BryanZ_: If I die before I wake, please convince mom this twitter account is fake. Amen.
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@jonnysun: why do birds sudenly appear every time you are near and how do u always manage to fit that many birds in ur mouth to begin with
@TheCiscoKidder: Drive down the middle of my street and make me squeeze by you, so I know who to murder first when the apocalypse hits.
@mariokeyparty: It's kind of funny how so many people think that being gay is a choice but being fat isn't