@MisterRots: If I ever become a ghost, no way I'm haunting some abandoned building. I'm finding the nearest lingerie store and setting up shop there
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@SadMeterologist: My neighbors are organizing something called a "fun run". This shit never happened when I lived in my car.
@sucittaM: Just called the fire department to tell them that dogs pee on fire hydrants so they should probably all wash their hands.
@bkdcasey: I told an ex of mine that i wished she was more punctual. So, from then on, she added !!!!!!! to every text. I have picked some winners.