@MisterRots: If I ever become a ghost, no way I'm haunting some abandoned building. I'm finding the nearest lingerie store and setting up shop there
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@WritePlay: Wife: I can't find my phone Me: Want me to call it? Wife: Sure, I - Me: PHONE, HERE BOY
@trevso_electric: I don't have ADD. It's just that everything is more interesting than what I have to get done.
@Ivsy01: I like extremes. I want a nerd, but he's gotta be an extreme nerd. Like I don't even want to understand what he's talking about.
@DaddyJew: Mechanic: what seems to be the problem? Me: nice try buddy, that's what I'm paying you for