@lanyardigan: If I ever get the chance to reveal a chupacabra to the world, I hope I have the presence of mind to say, "Chupacadabra!"
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@JizzleLizzle: Got so high last night we searched for my friend for half an hour while he helped us look
@iamburtjarvis: nurse: are you allergic to any medicine? me: laughter nurse: hahaha. OH MY GOD- me [face swelling up]: i thold thou.
@Kalarlis: my bf is wonderful but he will never be as soft as my roommate's dog who moved out of the house WHY GREG WHY CAN'T YOU BE AS SOFT AS THE DOG
@TheBoydP: Did you know that McDonald's once sold a burger named after the Hamburglar? It was discontinued however because the meat was too robbery.