@sucittaM: If I ever go missing I want my picture on a 40 oz beer rather than a milk carton, because I want fun people to find me.
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@NikiWithIssues: It's okay when Pac Man runs all over the place eating pills and claiming ghosts are after him but when I do it I'm "crazy."
@imadepoopstoday: [job interview] "We feel that you just aren't quite mature enough for the position." It's the Velcro shoes, isn't it. "...yes."