@pineappleiheart: If I get hurt playing Wii Sports, that's still a sports injury, right?
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@paulablu22: Telling my daugthers date that "she has lice and its very contagious the closer you get to her." *Correct way to parent.
@TheMichaelRock: HR: You can't urinate outside. Me: Then how will we keep the jellyfish away? HR: Can you take a drug test? Me: Nope, I'm all out of urine