@Gotham3: If I got a dollar every time a girl said I wasn't her type, I'd be her type.
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@Just_Lee_: My revenge for being designated driver is putting my car seat warmers on high and convincing my drunk friends that they pee'd in their pants
@AdriannaLaCervx: I squish my belly fat around during serious conversations because I have intimacy issues.
@NurseMurderer: This earthquake was the first time that I've ever said, "it was 4.7, but felt bigger."