@Gotham3: If I got a dollar every time a girl said I wasn't her type, I'd be her type.
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@designersays: If you love someone set them on fire. Did I get that right? Oh god what have I done. It's SET THEM FREE isn't it? Sorry burning loved one.
@animadvertguy: WIFE: really? ME: uh? WIFE: 20 mins and you haven't noticed? ME: oh! hair looks nice, hun WIFE: [crossing her 1 arm] I had my surgery today.
@TheHyyyype: My wife always tells me not to take things personally, so I hired a guy to do it for me. He already stole a bike.
@donni: Finally, you get a cab. The driver is a golden retriever. You hop in and hope for the best