@lalastrailer: If I had a dollar for everyone I work with who's dumber than me, I'd have $11 cause I work for a small company.
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@DadandBuried: You'll never know how creative you really are until you need to start lying to your kids.
@iwearaonesie: mom: no TV for a week! dad: and after you take a bath you can't use your hands to get out of the tub *sons jaw drops* mom: [whispers] nice
@Playing_Dad: Me: Not to be racist but you look like you're sick Her: How was that racist? Me: I said "not to be racist" you must be sicker than I thought