@Playing_Dad: If I had a time machine, I would go back to the day we first let my daughter watch SpongeBob SquarePants and just destroy our TV
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@KalvinMacleod: A fun way to make things uncomfortable at work is to buy a box of donuts for everyone but keep them on your lap.
@BooFricketyHoo: I'm on Twitter because my brother got a chemistry set for christmas when he was little and I got plaid pants.
@Pickles5366: Friend's Fb post: In search of a coat hanger My comment: Are you pregnant or are you locked out of your car? I've been on Twitter too long