@Fred_Delicious: If I had a time machine I'd alter the Big Bang Theory pilot episode so all the characters exploded in the very first scene
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@adamzopf: I'd run a marathon but I don't know if I can handle the commitment. I mean a lifetime of telling every person you meet you ran a marathon?
@bjaynash: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because it looks like you landed on your face.
@koalaslament: I hate it when I go to clean my daughters room & I emerge 3 hours later having just finished a delightful tea party with a giraffe & a pony.
@ItsAndyRyan: A thief has removed all the motorway signs in Yorkshire. Police are currently trying to find Leeds.