@jackmackenroth: If I had kids I would name them Ctrl, Alt and Delete so when they misbehaved I would just hit them all at once.
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@jimmytorosian: Scissors Commercial: *Montage of people karate chopping paper in half* Narrator: Don't you wish there was a better... Nevermind that was rad
@bracealmighty: My mate called me an idiot for always getting my idioms wrong but it takes one to know someone.
@UncleDuke1969: ALERT At 9:20am, I lost an apostrophe. Last seen in the word "Let's". If you see it, please send it home. Its tweet misses it.