@DonovanConvery: If I had the power to time travel, I would mostly just use it to stop past me from eating stuff from the fridge that I'd like to eat now.
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@LivibelsDada: You know you're too drunk to drive when you swerve to miss a tree then realise it was your air freshener.
@Sanbel11: "Baby, I'm in the bedroom waiting for you" Now I got your attention, let me show you a proper way to make the bed.
@JohnHilsen: You gotta admit that humans are the ultimate #1 lifeform because we're essentially half mermaid but we also have legs for kicking and stuff.
@iamMunga: Too many kids crying. I'm never having kids.I'm just gonna adopt an adult who has a job already.