@jocylan: If I haven't said something mildly offensive today I'm sorry and I promise to try harder
@kjmeow: I swear my toddler yells at me in Vietnamese
@iwearaonesie: She said, "Are you even listening to me? This is important!"
I said, "I don't know, pizza?"
And that's how the fight started
@AnneeWH: A fairy godmother but for breakups. She takes your phone and leaves alcohol and possibly your first cat.
@SCbchbum: Seriously, if I were a manager at Burger King, my answer to every complaint would be, “You’re at Burger King.”
@YUCKYBOT: Why does gigahertz? Because megabytez.