@meatballwizard: If I notice an unfinished jigsaw puzzle at someone's house, I eat a few pieces.
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@eudaimonium: Those who carry teensy cute purses shouldn't throw stones at those who wear cargo shorts, because I can carry more stones.
@UnFitz: It's called "personal grooming" as though we might get confused and groom a total stranger.
@Jack_Wagon1: Ironic... is having a coke machine reject your dollar bill for it being rolled up to many times.
@sliver_of: I can't commit to plans with friends who wear fitbits. -"No, I don't want to take the stairs again, you psycho."