@Robski_Boy: If I reach 700 followers, I'm gonna tweet naked for the next hour. Won't do much for you guys, but it'll certainly liven up Starbucks.
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@PFitzpa: My husband & I have a secret signal we use when it's time to leave a party. I pull an air horn out of my purse and blast it.
@1BigMick: If you believe the home alarm commercials, the first thing burglars do when they break into your home is smash your family pictures.
@joelu72: [being mugged] ME: can i keep things of sentimental value? ROBBER: ok ME:[pulling things from wallet] my favorite cash...my lucky debit card
@hoeroins: someone just tweeted "do crabs think fish are flying" and i just know this is all i'll think about for the rest of the year