@ShrinkMedia: If I wake and then I bake, I pray The Lord for chocolate cake. Amen.
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@fro_vo: [job interview] interviewer: where do you see yourself in 5 years? me: that's a trick question there is no c in any of those words
@taitutu: Judging by your selfie, I can't help wonder why your mother didn't try & sell you to a circus when you were younger.
@Douchekevin: Girlfriend told me she wants me to pull her hair , but apparently not while she's driving. Girls are weird.