@bourgeoisalien: If I was a vampire, pretty sure I'd find a way to cover blood in cheese.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Diversion50: I once had an epileptic fit during my turn at a game of charades. Everyone just kept yelling, "HOW MANY WORDS?" and "IS IT THE EXORCIST?".
@slimmy_shady: I tried to be polite and hold the door open for a woman, but she kept screaming, "I'm peeing in here!"
@KeetPotato: me: "why was she called the little mermaid, she was 5ft7?" therapist: "i meant anything bothering you about your marriage keith"
@internetluke: [leaving HS reunion w/ date] Aren't you going to ask why everybody was calling me 'smelly boy' tonight? "Seemed pretty clear I thought"