@IamEnidColeslaw: if I were Sleeping Beauty I would have killed the prince who woke me up
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@2thestreetz: *lights scented candle* *accidentally burns down house* *everyone agreed that it smelled amazing*
@SuperJuanderer: Blood is thicker than water. Then again, so is oatmeal, and I would much rather be oatmeal brothers.
@squirrel74wkgn: Wife: Are you gonna wear that to the cookout? Oh... *reaches under mesh shirt* *takes off nipple ring* Better?