@PurrrrrfectCat: If ignorance truly is bliss, my coworkers must be in a constant state of euphoria.
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@Vodkantots: As a Jew, I refuse to enter any steam room or sauna until I've seen other people come out.
@NYC_Blonde: I thought all the men at my gym were being exceptionally nice for a Monday morning but turns out my workout pants are just see-through.
@EndhooS: "What's for dinner?" Updog & chips. "Does updog have gluten in it?" No..wait..you're supposed to say... "You know I can't have gluten Karen"