@PurrrrrfectCat: If ignorance truly is bliss, my coworkers must be in a constant state of euphoria.
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@Faux_Ma: Her: "My baby paints with her food because she's artistic." Me: "That or your baby paints with her food because she's a goddamn baby."
@shadonium: Kid: What's a man? Dad: A man is who loves unconditionally , cares about you and protects you. Kid: When i grow up, I'll be a man like mom
@crabgirl_: The people in this spin class are looking at me like they've never seen a girl with a helmet before.
@OhNoSheTwitnt: If Elsa could bring snow to life why didn't she make herself some pets? I'd have like 50 snowcats by now.