@LuvPug: If I'm ever arrested, I would use my one phone call for pizza.
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@FoxyWinePocket: Son: Are you eating pie for breakfast? Me (eating pie): No. Fruit casserole. Want some? Son: NO. I hate casserole. Me (whispers): I know...
@theshantilly: Him: What are you doing? Me: Tweeting. Him: Gah. Such a colossal waste of time. Me: *stare* Him: *goes back to playing Candy Crush*
@PinkCamoTO: Me: Ask me no questions and I'll tell you no lies. Minister: That's not really appropriate for wedding vows.