@novicefather: If it looks like a rat and smells like a rat, odds are it's a vegan, black bean, veggie burger and my wife is cooking.
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@flashember: Think you know guilt? *takes long drag on cigarette* I'm the wildebeest who killed Mufasa. *exhales* I hear Simba's screams every night.
@shutupmikeginn: Someone should make a food app that connects to your bank account and only lists restaurants you can afford, could call it Welp
@Darlainky: I was just trying on the floral romper for fun but then the sales associate asked if my daughter was my sister and now I'm out $140.