@_Tempo11: If it looks like I'm typing for five minutes I'm really just trying to spell diarrhea.
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@dafloydsta: [job interview] "Why do you want to be a librarian?" I like people "What do you like about them?" *whispers* I like telling them to shut up
@MariyaAlexander: I had this nightmare that Salma Hayek and Kevin Hart were trying to tell me something at the same time and expected me to understand it
@david8hughes: [soldier dying in my arms] "You take this & you give it to my wife." "No [pushes watch back to soldier] she lives really far away from me."