@calluptome: If it weren't for the gutter, my mind would be homeless.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Xalqee: "If I act like I'm asleep he'll leave, If I act like I'm asleep he'll leave, if I act like I'm asleep he'll leave" - Me getting pulled over
@TommyWallace: [First date] okay just dont let her know you're a trump supporter Her: so what kinda wine should I get Me: haha white is always the best
@pplwtching: *uses Sharpie to write, "do not drop" on your newborn's forehead before handing it back.
@TheBoydP: *Wife sends me a link* *I click on link* *Buy whatever's at the link* *wait for delivery* ~Christmas shopping for my wife