@Freudianscript: If life has taught me anything, it's that browser history repeats itself.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@WilliamAder: I stopped carrying my phone in my shirt pocket, because every time it vibrated my first thought was: Heart attack!
@eliserose5: I need some sugar. Not the stupid kind that gives you mono, but the good kind that gives you diabetes.
@imdaintyaf: Me: What's the point if it's not a little violent, dirty? I wanna feel alive. The blood makes me feel ALIVE. Dentist: Please just floss more